No Human is Special

Those who have thought deeply about one’s place in the grand scheme of things have perhaps come across a written piece or two about our insignificance on this earthly plane save amongst those emotionally connected to us. It’s an argument based moderately on the enormity of the known universe. As a thought and better still, as a paradigm, it’s a healthy prescription and allows us to get on with life by acknowledging this form of meanness. A noble beau ideal.

In addition to the nothingness related and conferred to by the astrophysical perspective, we are also insignificant in terms of what life simply dishes out to us. We are not so special in fact, we are not special at all irrespective of what’s happening in our life at this present moment, or what’s happened in the past and, what’s in store for us. I’m not speaking spiritually rather in the practical what’s seen, heard, experienced and felt gist. Everything, every manner of human experience, good or bad, delightful or abhorrent has preceded you in others.

What is that you’re asking of me? The experiences to which I am referring? Too many to list! A life lived embodies an infinite sum of occurrences and happenstances and, the resultant feelings and emotions that arise from such. A tapestry is woven by the sum of experience by way of the hand we are dealt.

Are you in love, madly in love, in lust perhaps? A form of lust and love so intense that you believe it’s private and special, that no other couple could be so fortunate. You haven’t read James Joyce’s letters, the dirty and the most beautiful. Have you been subjected to what you believe is the worst of humankind? Perhaps you should learn more about the holocaust. Have you lost a dearest family member to a disease or accident? Lost a home to fire? Won a lottery? Are you mega-rich or, mega poor? Been wrongly incarcerated, witnessed a loved one being raped, climbed a peak actual or metaphorical? Ad infinitum … You are not the first to experience anything.

And pity those who espouse that feeling of being special as realised from the power conferred through their careers or whatever positions or stations in life they reside in, rather than, intrinsic values. Life isn’t concerned with an artificial sense of importance.

Whatever your present human condition, someone somewhere in the world today, or in the past, has been there, has felt the same uplifting and glorious or otherwise, miserable and depraved emotions. Whatever contemplation may surface that you are uniquely unlucky or lucky, blessed, exceptional, or special in some way, banish the thought, for someone has been there.

For all of us, life offers a ceaseless succession of experience and encounter providing trials, outcomes, lessons and the resultant emotions.

This should not be interpreted such that the sheer scale and continuum of the human experience and, the universe make living pointless. More accurately, it should be a wake-up call to rise above the noise of modern-day life with all its push-pull factors and to embrace the power that comes from not being special, from insignificance itself.

You are not special….

Ecclesiastes 1:9 What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.

To Love to die, To die to love

To love, is to accept that you have made an inescapable pact with grief. From Maria Popova, once referred to as, Cartographer of meaning in a digital Age a beautiful piece exploring what love and death share in the magic of life. 

Love and death come to us on common terms — unbidden and total, impervious to protest, naked of pretension. They also come to us entwined: Every love is a franchise of grief, for to love anything is to accept its loss — by a dissipation of ardor or of atoms, the atoms constellating the beloved or the atoms constellating us and the consciousness that does the loving, certain to one day go the way of every other consciousness and every other love that ever was and ever will be.

In some deep sense, this inevitability of loss is precisely what makes love so ecstatic — a concentrated experience of aliveness consecrated by its own perishability.

I have, more than once or twice, reflected on life post the loss of loved ones. A thought too painful to contemplate, a thought for which I cannot find a solution in ways I would normally. The only solace being that many before me have been forced against all known forces, to cross a similar, if not same bridge. Would it be better to escape the inevitability of grief by not loving? Isn't death part of the story of life itself? By removing one, you remove the other; life, love and loss entwined. 

Read the whole piece here

The Mentally Strong

I wouldn’t refer to myself as intellectually or mentally strong, but through all my senses, I have learned enough in my years to suggest that those who have had a different mindset, one that lends itself to greater levels of inner peace, in spite of life's offerings no matter how adverse. Do you know anyone like that? Nothing seems to throw them off, it’s as if little fazes them. They’re still subject to sadness, pain and suffering, only an automaton wouldn’t, but not exclusively, they can handle much more misfortune and hardship than most folk.

So what’s going on here? Has it to do with intelligence, background, culture, past events or is it something more elusive. I am willing to bet it has a little of all the above but mostly, the mentally strong have a mindset that embraces a continuing dogged quest for personal growth that focuses on managing their own behaviour, thoughts and therefore resultant feelings. I stress, their own!

There may be a myriad of ways they achieve this, but for the purpose of this writing, permit me to summarize what I’ve learned. The mentally strong avoid certain things, objects of thoughts if you will, that could impair their inner peace.

1. They have no interest in impressing fellow humans. There is nothing wrong with pointing out your new material joy once, whether it be a new Tesla or $12,000 Rolex watch, nor is there anything wrong with highlighting your kid's educational achievements once, notice the keyword? Once! But when you know someone that highlights that same material joy, not once but every time you see them or, that steers the conversation such that their child’s double degree, or masters degree or doctoral degree gets a mention not once, but almost every second time you get together then something else is going on. This compare and contrast mentality signals a poor internal constitution and low self-esteem on the part of the boaster, usually a mum and it’s easily recognised. The mentally strong, do not need or seek any form of admiration or approval as they are entirely comfortable with what is. It’s their own values, principles, beliefs and standards that ultimately dictate a course of action or their thought processes and their conversations.
2. Seeking perfection is for the weak, seeking excellence is for the strong. The mentally strong understand and welcome failure while recognizing their flaws. 
3. They refuse to partake in anger and will not harbour grudges in the knowledge that this will only diminish them. This as a way of embracing the positive energy that surrounds them (and us all) not the negative opposite. 
4. They refuse to blame their misfortune or problems on that outside of them; external circumstances. Their focus is more often than not, on what is within their control. They do not understand, let alone acknowledge any notion related to the world (or people) being out to get them. It’s commonly referred to a victim mentality.
5. Materialism is not part of their language. Nice new car, big home, expensive stuff, possessions whatever. This is not to suggest their minimalists, what it does suggest is that they only have a material interest in what brings them pleasure and in turn, serenity.
6. You instinctively know the toxic types when you come across them, then why engage them? The mentally strong avoid them at all cost knowing full well, that there is little to be achieved by attempting any engagement.
7. They understand their limitations while acknowledging that they are prone to mistakes. In saying that, they understand that one cannot prevent the nasties in life, whatever they may be, They can mitigate the risk of occurrence but that’s as far as it goes. Things out of their immediate sphere of control are accepted as such. 
8. They understand that long term satisfaction is what counts as opposed to needing to be continually happy. They almost inherently understand that contentment is gained through hard work, sometimes involving significant and sustained effort.  
9. Comfort zones are for the mediocre. They do not avoid discomfort. While avoiding outright recklessness, they know the level of discomfort that can be tolerated and ultimately engender personal growth. 
10. You cannot do it all on your own, complete self-reliance is a paradox of sorts, as no single individual has all the answers. They understand that there is no weakness in seeking assistance or professional help when needed. 

If any of the above is even remotely accurate, it calls for some regulation of emotions and behaviours despite whatever the circumstances; something that takes courage and effort but it’s what sets the mentally strong apart from the rest.

How the Internet is changing us

The Internet is revolutionizing the way we learn, communicate, meet, interact, do business, the way we spend our time, our sleep, in short, the way we live.

Its impact is far from having peaked and has futurists deliberating on exactly where it’s taking humanity. The networked online life has, in its relatively brief history provided unparalleled change of a revolutionary nature mostly benefiting humanity, but it’s not that simple.

We may multitask more but that does not necessarily mean more productivity nor smartness. Some would argue the Web is dumbing us down in our quest to seek instant answers to just about anything life throws at us. Consider how often young people use spare or “dead-time” compared to yesteryear. Read a book? Thankfully many still do, but many more prefer to surf aimlessly or otherwise immerse themselves in social media and its imaginary acquaintances commonly termed, online friends.

The simple impacts include the demise of telegrams, its influence on politics and political campaigns, it’s becoming our first port of call when sick, it’s giving many a form of false celebrity status, its killed phone books, road maps and relationships. Do wrist watches still serve any functional purpose? Will kitchens survive? Think Ubereats. Meeting people at bars, clubs or parks (imagine that) poof.  Music discovery has become a thing of the past, in its place algorithms in apps such as Spotify to curate the songs and genres you or they want you, to like. Entertainment in terms of television (remember that word?) and movies are available whenever and wherever we want.

The internet is having a homogenizing effect far greater than cheap airline travel and killing languages, consider that little of the world's 7000+ languages and dialects have migrated across to the web. Encyclopedias and reference books are out, even Britannica is out of print. Privacy is all but dead, try as you might to remain anonymous.

Recall the days when Web pages were nothing but a bunch of words with scattered hyperlinks? That was Web 1.0 seemingly a lifetime ago and yet Web 2.0, denoting websites that emphasize user-generated content, usability, and interoperability for end users, is only around 16-18 years old depending on your source. What will Web 3.0 bring? Is it already upon us? Some say yes. And what role will Artificial Intelligence play in its emergence?

Combined with globalization, the internet is already changing us not merely as individuals but in terms of cultural identity. Previously understood models of space, time and distance are being turned upside-down. Cultural globalization, for better or worse is upon us and raises an important question for humanity. Considering its profound influence, has the internet and all it encompasses become more than a technology? Will social science practitioners soon refer to it as a kind of cultural artifact that emerged in the late twentieth and early twenty first century?

In the face of rapid exponential adjustment, the perpetual fusion - immersion if you will - of a future internet in our lives and, the way in which it may blur online life as opposed to real life, make it nigh impossible to foretell what our lives will look like, even in as little as 30 years. It would not be unrealistic to suggest that attempts at forecasting likely changes in around 50 to 100 years would render common folk and, perhaps even current day experts, incoherent. If you doubt me, consider how often we hear the term social media today; "social media" as we know it did not exist just 10 years ago.

In the film Her, Theodore has a relationship with an Operating System.

I would argue that the future will brim with opportunity and benefit, but we must begin deliberating upon the potential harmful impacts awaiting humankind and whether we must ever confront challenges of the kind put forward by proponents of dystopia and whether we will ever have to deal with that, “hypothetical instant in time when artificial intelligence and other technologies have become so advanced that humanity undergoes a dramatic and irreversible change” – the singularity moment.

Further reading:

How the Internet Has Changed Everyday Life 

Bill Gates on dangers of artificial intelligence

5 Movies that Explain the Concept of Singularity

By 2030 we may find ourselves in an #InternetOfActions world where billions of autonomous machines will use interoperable data to manipulate matter, orchestrate human activity and alter how we perceive the world. Hearing from the experts @Telstra #TelstraLabs tonight #IOT #ethics pic.twitter.com/rZPw4hXJBB

— Madeleine Grummet (@MadsGrummet) July 18, 2018

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