A Notable Personal Introspection

Considering I was, and have been in varying extents silly, immature, anxious, cruel, reckless and impatient, egotistical, unprofessional, incompetent, irrational and simply bad most often. I refer to the age of 15 - 25 and, to a lesser though still significant extent, between the age of 25 – 35, and again to a lesser but still significant extent, between the age of 35 – 45, and yet again, to a lesser extent from the age of 45 onward .... I am now fantastically successful in my mid fifties.

As I reflect on this, I also realize that at core, I always knew where the “off” button was, I knew when to draw the line, I knew how to maintain the fundamentals right, e.g. marrying the right girl, buying a home, keeping a job, keeping my financials in order etc. I also knew how to maintain appearances and create righteous facades. Nonetheless, this does not diminish the fact that I was, at times very irresponsible, and came too close to outright sabotage and yet, given where I am at this time, being August 2016, in totality I am fantastically successful, in spite of my past foolish idiosyncrasies.

The other realization is that the first paragraph reveals improvement as I grew older, and this is the inspiring feature of my being, better late than never, constant and never-ending improvement to become the man, person, and “individual” I am today.

I am tempted to list the acts that constitute the “foolish idiosyncrasies” to which I refer, however this may not be a worthwhile exercise, more to the point, I feel it would be self-defeating. 

One way to make amends is to continue growing, becoming better and ultimately more successful still...

Radical to forms of liberal Islam – Is intrinsic change possible in a new country, Australia?

"... it is my belief that we can never discount the possibility that radical Muslims or simply those susceptible to elements of such will remain a threat to our way of life, not merely those from abroad but unfortunately and most alarmingly, the home grown variety ..."

Recent mumblings about the failure of multiculturalism coming out of Europe, in addition to the ongoing spats about race and immigration issues here in Australia, not to mention Islamic threats cultivated within our borders have left me wondering whether our terrorist fears stem from issues associated with integration, pure racism or actual terrorist threats. Let us be honest, we have problems associated with race or otherwise, anti-Muslim sentiments as demonstrated by recent findings that show, 1 in 10 Australians have “very problematic views on diversity and on ethnic difference". In a recent discussion with friends they seemed to justify their concern in terms of possible terror threats posed by those arriving on our shores illegally.

Is this concern valid? This is a question I posed several years ago when writing a short piece whilst at University where the topic was ‘change’. Specifically,  can those illegals who harbour radical elements of their faith change by abandoning such beliefs as they commune within their new society, moving away from considerations of the extreme or moderately fanatical elements of Islamic thought - moving therefore, from radical to forms of liberal Islam.

Upon reading it once again, I got thinking about how it might apply to personal change in relation to religious doctrine and beliefs, not just adaptation but rather, deep seated and cultural transformation among Muslims living for example, in the United States, Great Britain and Australia.

I refer to the tens of thousands of Muslims that form part of our communities and in particular, what proportion of them may harbour radical elements of their faith. Unfortunately, studies reveal that a small but significant segment not only sympathise with their radical colleagues but have a propensity to consider and carry out violent acts against westerners in spite of an entire lifetime living amongst and appearing to outwardly enjoy the benefits of the societies in which they reside. How could this be? I should add that the percentage of Islamists who pose a danger to their communities within for example, Australia would be very, very small, perhaps minuscule, but as we noted with the London bombings and the 9/11 attacks it does not take many to inflict harm on a massive scale.

It poses more questions, does ones external environment and the behavioural modifications and modes of personal conduct associated with such, lead to permanent change. I guess we need to consider the question of change as it relates to the common oxford definition, one that refers to a person 'making or becoming different', because of environmental factors. This obliges me to consider that age-old concept of modernism, in particular, the modernist concept of a 'true (constant) self'.

I am of the opinion that participation within our way of life does indeed involve being changed and changing oneself however, I do not feel that the change is intrinsic, and accordingly, the modernism concept of a 'true self' is compelling.

I do not wish to delve into comprehensive considerations about “concepts of self”, as one could write a thesis in this area alone; it is easier to restrict the discussion to the more discernible elements of Muslims within our social order.

All societies have unique characteristics that provoke different thoughts and subsequent actions amongst it participants. They also all have there own grand and historical elements that present a multifaceted culture both as a whole and within its parts. Even as there are various consistencies and diffusion amongst different groups, disciplines, and sub-cultures, a person (in this case Muslim) may at least, be influenced by a society’s ‘different norms and values’ … ‘patterns of power and authority’ … ‘different standards’ … [and] ‘modes of expression’ (Kolb, David, 1981 p.233). The influence of a society is exacted circuitously upon individuals through the processes and norms of its institutions and this represents but one way that a culture, exacts change (the accepted social order) upon partakers. Whether this influence inhibits or promotes real change toward westernisation, depends on the person’s disposition and worldview (the overall perspective from which one sees and interprets the world), and we know how much this can vary between different cultures and religions. At another level, the extent of change, obligatory or otherwise, will contrast amongst individuals again depending on their worldview, (which also includes their deep seated beliefs), but also made subjective by their education, specifically the disciplines one may study. Incidentally, education of even the highest standards does not; in itself guarantee to purge ones deep-seated and fundamental beliefs.

Of course one can also mount a plausible contrasting argument on the belief that any modifications of behaviour as a result of environmental factors are in fact indicative of real and lasting change, arguing that humans are ‘fragmented’, ‘fluid’ and ‘constructed’; that ones experiences lend to the construction of self – classic post modernism, (this is in contrast to modernism views expressed and defined with terms such as, 'fixed' and having a 'true', 'unified', and essential self). Uncertainties in relation to which concept of self applies arise when one acknowledges the difference in human modes of conduct, in differing life roles. We may be one self as a mother, sister, or brother, a different self as an employee and different again depending on our roles. The different contexts create a problem, thus we mistakenly confuse behavioural changes and environmentally induced responses with concepts of self, believing that they are more representative of Post Modernism thinking. Here I cannot agree, imagine if you will moving to a strictly Muslim nation, behaviorally you may present differently but can you really expect to discard all that you have been, all that has been indoctrinated into your being through socialisation and guardians over time within your home culture? Will your fundamental worldview shift at all, let alone profoundly?

Like all humans, Muslims aspire to certain universal attributes of character and whilst these may differ amongst them, the majority (like all of us) seek to be content, happy, and good as based around an established worldview (and self) that minimally takes into account race, gender, class, geography and present and past cultures that they, may have experienced. There is a lot to take into account hence, this needs to be considered as part of our attempt to understand the inner beliefs and ruminations of the radical Islamist and the depth of hatred toward anyone whose beliefs run contrary.

The process of being changed and changing as a person lends to the exploration of feelings of, and about life goals and purpose. Thus membership and participation in our, or indeed any society/culture facilitates and contributes to a process whereby, 'the meaning of … personal directions' is explored thus guiding the person toward that which is the essential, already constructed self, so as to move toward, ' … that self which one already is' (Rogers, Carl R. 1967). Therefore, it goes that in spite of all life experiences and the resulting outward change exhibited by Islamists, age-old questions linger. It is as if there is inherent within, a quest to move toward the 'true self'; that self which has always been. As Carl Roger's states, an ‘individual moves toward being, knowingly and acceptingly, the process which he inwardly and actually is … listening to the deepest recesses of his … being'. As an example, I vividly recall a conversation with a group of young (twenty something) Bosnian Serbs as we discussed news reports about Bosnian Serb soldiers systematically executing as many as 2,000 Muslim prisoners after taking the UN ''safe area'' of Srebrenica. To my disbelief, the young Australian born Serbs completely condoned the actions of their compatriots overseas. Probing for explanations one of them simply said, “I don’t know, I just feel it here,” pointing to the centre of his chest, added another, “It’s in the blood”.

Accordingly, it is my belief that we can never discount the possibility that radical Muslims or simply those susceptible to elements of such will remain a threat to our way of life, not merely those from aboard but unfortunately and most alarmingly, the home grown variety.

We humans have a central 'true self' that remains intact throughout our lives in spite of society’s dominant contemporary and historical permanence, its institutional processes, values, ideology, culture and sub-cultures.

If I am right, even partially so, what is the most constructive way to deal with our local Muslim populations? Wouldn't any attempt to indoctrinate them in terms of western values be an exercise in futility? Is acceptance and tolerance the answer? Perhaps as a way of teaching them the values of mutual respect for all cultures and race.

What do you think?

© 2016 Ottavio Marasco. All rights reserved.

References:

Rogers, Carl R. 1967, 'To be that self which one truly is': A therapist's view of personal goals', On Becoming a Person: A therapist's view of psychotherapy, Constable, London, pp. 163-182.

Kolb, David A. 1981, 'Learning styles and disciplinary differences' in Chickerine, Arthur W. & Associates, The Modern American College, Jossey Bass, San Francisco, pp. 232 - 235 and 251 - 252.

Moments of Reflection

Travelling home on a train in moments of personal reflection, I wrote:

I am neither good nor bad; assuming I know what constitutes such. I am incomplete, can one be complete? Seems all is in a state of perpetual flux, searching amid moving ever-changing environs inside and out, not the I am lost, far from it. This I know, I know I am, I exist, I am energy of such volume as to constitute discernible matter, mass if you will. I am everything and nothing; I am past, present and future in any given earthly moment.

Could such thoughts, such introspection signal growth, maturity, wisdom?

Sapientia et Doctrina

A Good Enough Life

I am getting on, it is time to take some stock, to pause, reflect and map for I am embedded within an age bracket known as the early fifties, and how do I know?

Apart from the obvious, that I was born a few months after the construction of the Berlin Wall, read again, I did not say fall of the Berlin Wall! Moreover, how palpable it is, when I gaze into the mirror each morning, not to mention the many small impromptu reminders that present. Like when Twitter notifies me that I have a new follower today. Eager to see who, I touch the little white birdy on my smart phone screen and presto, the new follower is, The 50+ Feed with a profile that reads, “A steady feed of news, commentary and resources relevant to the culture, legacy, health, happiness, wisdom and well being of today's 50+ population”.  I'm drawn to the term legacy, so follow back.

Advice is good and though my life is not travelling that smooth, – I have teenage kids – I know that nobody can say theirs is perfect, not unless they lie. Still, my ever-evolving life on this mortal plane with its diminishing highs and incessant lows, the latter seemingly so low as to be of a subterraneous quality of late, has taught me a thing or two. Therefore, as I now enter the second half of my early 50’s, I have concluded that I am in the midst of a good enough life, and have compiled a small, not so insignificant inventory of lessons that smooth my path in this fluid, constructed and yet unconstructed, chaotic though organised reality.

• Have you heard the expression or idiom, “are you finished?” or, “all done?” well sorry to say, but in life it is never done, nothing is ever complete
• Life is great but some days are boring, mundane and routine
• Sometimes you have to do so much to achieve so little, kind of like, eating an artichoke 
• It is more than okay if your home is in a mess even though, the infomercial world tells us that it must always present like a showroom 
• There is nothing more pointless or common than doing the same things over and over, but expecting different results
• When people ask, “how are you?’ and you reply, “I’m good yourself?” or worse still, you reply like those Boston, New England types with the irritable “excellent you?” I can assure you, they know you really mean, life sucks  
• It is probably a good idea to tell those you care about that you love them, though sometimes it is also a good idea to refrain from such, let them sweat a tad
• Whenever restless or anxious in bed remember, sleep eventually comes though maybe not tonight
• If you occasionally think monogamy is tough it’s okay, the storm will eventually pass, but careful what you get up to in storms eye
• You are ultimately, what you do, not what you say you will do
• Any relationship is selfishly controlled by the one who cares least
• Feelings follow behaviour
• Not all who wander are lost – are your kids or a family members failing at school or withering in some endeavour? Many hippies and counterculture types that rebelled in the late 60’s eventually became successful white-collar professionals later in life
• Sometimes you hate those you love 
• You can survive without daily to do lists
• Promise yourself, that you will punch the lights out of the next person that says, ‘a new paradigm of thought’
• Sometimes you are just too damn busy to catch up with friends and if they do not understand, they were not your friends after all
• Family life is tough
• You can feel guilty for doing what is right like going to work, though equally, you can feel guilty for not going to work
• As you get older, you grow smaller, an obvious oxymoron
• If it helps, it is okay to suggest that your wife shop at Victoria’s Secret and if she does not get it, she should
• Red wine is tonic
• If you feel the others have normal lives then you do not know them well
• If you do not plan for or schedule sex, it’s probably not going to happen
• Sometimes 2-minute noodles are okay for tea, or if you are of Italian derivative, pasta e burro is fine to
• We have choices and the advertising world pounds this in us. Moreover, if for a moment, you thought that advertisers pay us little or no attention think again. Recall all those insurance, funeral plan and retirement village ads you hear on those easy listening stations
• Dark chocolate is bliss the more cocoa the better  
• How others perceive you ought not to be of concern
• Vigorous exercise is the best antidepressant, vigorous sex better still
• Growing old is not avoidable  
• You think life sucks until the doc utters the word cancer
• Health is king!
• Lists are for losers

Comments always welcomed

© 2014 Ottavio Marasco. All rights reserved.